My 8 Step Foreplay Technique

Oh boy I used to suck at foreplay, I used to literally think foreplay was 1 minute kissing, then on to feeling every part of her body and then straight in for the kill. As you can imagine my sex life was a BIG fail for a while. But, as I talk about in “How I Got Better At Sex” I did manage to turn things round and massively improve my foreplay and sex techniques. Today I’m here to explain the 8 step rule that pretty much has guaranteed me successful, highly likely orgasmic foreplay.
Me saying “Learn my foreplay technique”
Friendly Advice on Arousal
Sex without foreplay is like trying to eat the last bit of food on your plate without starting the meal, it’s just not gonna happen.
And as someone who sucked at foreplay, I can honestly say that if you do go straight in for the kill you will be left with frustration at your partner’s inability to orgasm/get wet.
Tip: Sometimes a female will want you to skip certain steps when they are already horny and wet, read her body language to gauge the speed you should go. Also remember to kiss her throughout the entire process.
Text: Start far away from her sensitive areas
Step 1. The Arousal Technique
Foreplay should be treated like a bar of chocolate that you want to make last as long as possible. This happens to be why we start at the hands/wrists and work our away up.
Give her a light hand massage and center it to the palm of her hand, while occasionally tracing the outline of her fingers and wrist, with your fingertips. Next, start running your finger tips up her inner arm starting from the wrist and heading to the elbow. You can do this while having a make out session, just remember to be ultra gentle as it’ll get her tingling.
Tip: Practice this on yourself and see what feels the best.
Why Hands Are Amazing:
There’s so many nerves in our fingers, wrist and palm of our hand. By simply stimulating them you get the blood flowing and open up more exclusive erogenous zones.
It’s also relaxing for the girl and loosens her up.
Picture of my second method of arousal
Step 2. Slowly Waking Up The Body
Stop making out and lightly bring your hand up the rest of her arm, at this point you need to start kissing up her arm starting a few inches above the elbow.
You shouldn’t need more than 3 kisses while working your way up to her shoulder and once you’re there you’ll need to do another 3 kisses, then finally go in for a light neck kiss. Chances are her neck will still be sensitive, so only kiss it once (for now).
Extra: In some scenarios you’ll be able to spend more time on her shoulders (when you’re a close couple), if you get the chances then give them a massage for a few minutes, this warms up the area and makes the neck less sensitive later on.
Picture of back and spine massage
Step 3. Back Massager, Oil, Light Neck Kissing
At this point you can take her top off and get her to lay on her stomach, ideally you’ll have edible massage oil (America – Europe), but if not feel free to use baby oil or any massage oil you have laying about.
Give her a deep, back massage and throughout keep kissing her neck, remember not to go over board. You can also spice it up by trying a naughty whisper if she likes dirty talk.
Why this works
It’s the perfect way to remove pressure, stress and anxiety away from her body, it also helps stimulate her erogenous zones indirectly which later helps you give her orgasmic pleasure.
You can learn different massage techniques by looking at YouTube or using Google.
Tip: If you can’t give her a massage due to having no oil or it just not being the right scenario, you can instead use your fingertips to trace her back, then when the times right add a little back kissing in their too. Not as effective, but should still give her tingles.
Step 4. Sexual Lower Back and Spine Massage
Once you’ve massaged her upper back, shoulders and been kissing her throughout the process, it’s then time to focus on the lower back and spinal cord, the lower back is a great spot for sexual arousal in a women and when touched gently, with passion and after the stimulation above, it’s a great opening to bigger more intense stimulation.
The spinal cord is also filled with nerves, so lightly running your finger tips up and down it a few times never hurts.
Picture of text saying: How to touch the boobs and stomach
Step 5. Work Your Way Up The Stomach To The Boobs (Ear, Behind Ear)
Now she’ll certainly be warmed up and ready for the more intense stimulation at this point. So roll her over and start gently kissing up her stomach towards her boobs.
Once you get to the boobs you actually want to focus on the outside before going straight to the nipple (It’s all about the build up). Grab one boob firmly with your hand and then the other gently kiss, lick and play using your mouth, while slowly working your way to the nipple.
Gently outline the nipple in a circle motion, do this a few times and then go in for the kill.
Methods: you can strum the tip of your tongue over the nipple, continue the circle motion with random flicks of your tongue to the nipple, passionately kiss the nipple, even try firmly licking her nipple, try all of the above and just see what she reacts best too.
While doing this you can stop and start passionately kissing her neck and even lightly kissing her earlobe (be warned girls lose control when this is done right)
Extra: If you’ve got edible massage oil (America – Europe) you can drip some over the front of her body and move your hands around, ending at the boobs, some women really go crazy when you mix licking with hand stimulation and a boob massage. It just makes the build up that much more intense for you both.
Step 6. Move Your Hand Down To Her Thighs
While continuing to stimulate her breasts you can start moving your hands down to her thighs. Now at this point you’ll not want to over tease her and end up annoying her.
So you have two options:
Oral sex – If your partner enjoys oral sex then make your way down in between her legs. I always find girls respond better to oral sex while wearing a blindfold, if you don’t have one just grab a top/tie and place it around her head covering her eyes.
Now you’ll want big succulent kisses down her thigh towards her vagina and then back up to her other thigh. Do this once then let the pleasure commence. There’s too many oral sex techniques for me to explain so just read my guide on giving a women oral sex and use the methods I explain.
Option two is below.
how to stimulate her clitoris
Step 7. Stimulate The Clitoris
At this point your partner will be throbbing with pleasure and usually respond to any type of clitoral stimulation.
So if your partner prefers fingers to oral sex here’s what you do. With cut/filled nails you make your way down to her vagina, you’ll want to have her laying on her back with her legs spread wide apart. Start by lightly strumming up and down with your index finger, you need to be gentle and remember not to go to quick, but keep a solid motion.
Start speeding up and maybe add a little pressure (still be extremely gentle), you can read her body language and vocal expressions to see if she’s enjoying it. If she is then continue that motion, speed and pressure.
Key: Female orgasms are like sneezes, they come and go and then won’t come back. This usually occurs when you stop the motion, speed up, slow down or let her clit get dry when she’s near to climax.
So, spend the first few minutes seeing what she reacts too, then make slow adjustments, nothing to radical while she’s close to cumming.
Tip: Even when a girl is really wet I sometimes add a small amount of lube to my index finger, it just stops the clit from getting dry while stimulating it close to orgasm and at the moments of pleasure where you can’t just push the natural lube up at risk of ruining her orgasm.
Step 8. G-spot Stimulation
I always make sure she has a clitoral orgasm then I finally penetrate to stimulate the g-spot. I find that the g-spot unlocks once a female has achieved a clitoral orgasm, so you can either use your fingers and the “come here” motion, a g-spot sex toy or even your penis to make her squirt/reach a g-spot orgasm after the clitoral fun is done.
I could do a 10,000 word article on g-spot stimulation and making a girl squirt, so I’ll just leave it at that and give you something to look forward to in the future.
Extra Resources
How to Give a Sensual Massage She’ll Never Forget [From Her] – Up your massage game making this article even powerful.
How To Give A Real Pussy Massage – This pussy massage will take your female partner to the next level of orgasmic pleasure.
Pinterest picture of me talking about my foreplay method
It’s simple yet highly effective, give it a try to see what you think. I hope you have a wonderful day and be sure to leave a comment if you want to chat. Cheers, Oli.

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